Managing Deceit and Betrayal

I spent 2018 on a journey into global deceit and betrayal. I didn’t start the year with that intention, I’d started it by running for my local congressional seat in New York City, which is held by an OLD-guard Democrat from the first Clinton era. Jerry Nadler. I didn’t have anything personal against him. But under his watch and that of the whole West Side Party mafia, I’d seen air rights stolen from Affordable Housing in East Harlem and given to Hudson Yards, a super-tall tax-haven, waterfront playground for the Billionaire Elite and their Maseratis that leveled a century of history that was New York’s Garment District. 

For anyone who’s watched Mrs. Maisel, that’s where her father had his garment business and where many immigrants got their start in the fashion and garment industries -- including my friends Hector and Elsa. It’s also here my friend Erika sourced her zippers and leather from local artisans for her Emalle Handbags and wallets and Gwynne found materials for her Japanese-nspired décor. So, to me that was the ultimate betrayal of everything that was the New York I’d grown up in and loved. Where Lady Liberty embraced the tired, poor, huddled, immigrant masses. Where my grandparents and great grandparents arrived via various vessels, and where my dad tried his young Irish hand as an assistant to a local Jewish furrier. 

After 2 years under Trump’s deceit and betrayals, I’d also seen my country and world go topsy turvy over “Truth and “Mistruth”, “Fake News”, the development of extreme right and extreme left, and the very careful masking of really important information under the guise of clickbait”. 

It was exhausting, especially when the Truth was so Clear. As were the policies and arguments to be made. And for anyone interested, you can read all my policy-proposals from 4 years ago here. Standing firm, I tried to play the role of the intelligent independent-yet-Democratic candidate. I really did believe equitable access to economic opportunity, good education, sustainable infrastructure, affordable healthcare and clean, green spaces to play were essential and could be achieved.. So I ran. But along the path of that marathon, where betrayal and deceit by “friends” and “staff” took every ounce of my self-belief, my journey took me deep beyond the deceit and betrayals of New York and my crumbling vision of it. 

Conversatuions with Greg Khallil, who’d worked with the Oslo Accords/Clinton administration on the closest Israeli-Palestinean Peace deal ever reached as well as  Rev. Dr. Katharine Rhodes Henderson of the Auburn Seminary, introduced me into the very dark and murky waters that are Montgomery, Alabama and its slave-trading-to-freedom-fighting past as well as the ever more deeply complex and terrifying reality that is the situation in Israel and the Occupied Territories. I have no desire to offend any of my readers, but after having had a machine gun leveled at my Palestian-Christian friend’s head by IDF militia at the orders of a Settler while in Hebron, I realized my small life and its miniscule betrayals were irrelevant in the grand scheme. And that at the end of the day, “resolution” whether racially-based, terrirory-based or history-based may never be “found” or “achieved”. It may simply and only be managed and negotiated through “settlements”, with an attempt to hear and respect all parties. 

So, this past week when I discovered that once again I’d been betrayed and deceived by people I’d trusted as “friends”, “advisors”, and even “legal cousel”, here in Bermuda, and that my entire living situation was potentially, completely fraudulent and illegal as a non-Bermudian renter, I froze, stuck between outrage, despair and another

What could I do? How could I fix this? Should I run? Should I stay? Should I fight? Should I give up? WHO COULD I TRUST? And in my mind I returned to 2018. I took the lessons I’d learned from Montgomery, Israel/Palestine, and even New York, and realized there may be no “winning” here, as I’d hoped, there may only be, lessons learned, negotiation and a tenuous “settlement”.

And that is what I intend to do, with all my ducks in a row, rationality at my side, and the backing of Independent  Counsel and Advisors to guide my path.

So, to those of you facing similar issues, I’d suggest digging deep, standing your ground, finding your inner negotiator and asking a good independent sounding board to guide your steps.

Holly Lynch is a 20+ year communications veteran and life-long social impact advocate and strategist who has helped individuals, educational leaders, and companies tackle the toughest challenges in their worlds.
Having survived countless life setbacks and two rounds with terminal cancer, while seeing the country-wide collapse of the systems and safety nets for the most vulnerable in and outside our communities, she is now shifting her life and career trajectories to focus on coaching those facing down fundamental shifts and transitions as they try to navigate and rebuild their lives, institutions and businesses during these unprecedented times.